~die....i dun want to patch up...~
~i noe he is a nice guy and all dat...and i noe, he's been waiting for me for like 4 years now..(i'm really touched by that)~
~but...arghh!!!! i just can't!!~
~i wonder if he actually remembers all the bad things i did to him last tyme..~
~its like i've broke his heart too many times before..~
~doesn't he feel hurt? doesn't he feel tempted to ever say "fuck off waney!"????~
~why?? why doesn't he??~
~ouh god....please please help him move on in life...~
~please let him meet a gerl who could shower him with all the love anyone could ever give~
~why must he keep on loving someone like me??~
~ouh god, why must you keep hurting him... just let him get over me...~
~i dun care if i'm the one hurting instead ...just make him move on....~
~i dun noe wad to say to him whenever he calls and asks me for an answer..~
~i dun noe how to disappoint him in a nice way anymore..~
~sometimes i just feel like telling him that i hate him...that i never want to have anything to do with him anymore...~
~maybe that way, he will learn to hate me and finally get over me....~
~but i can't possibly bring myself to say that...at the same tyme, i dun want him to keep living in his empty dreams...~
~maybe i should just shut up...act blur??~
~i'll just see wad happens next...~
darkness falls @ 1:12 AM